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Welcome to the newest post in Writing While Healing, a series where I speak with indie authors who’ve found light through writing during their darkest times.
Today, I’m honored to feature Matthew Arnold Stern. You can learn more about Matthew Arnold Stern here.
Please introduce yourself!
Thank you for having me. I'm Matthew Arnold Stern, an award-winning speaker and author. I've published four novels, including Amiga and The Remainders, and I have a book about public speaking, Mastering Table Topics. My fifth novel, Christina's Portrait, is in submission.
Please tell us a little about yourself and the kind of stories you write.
I write about characters who face challenges and must learn to overcome them. In Christina's Portrait, one of my main characters lost her mother during the COVID pandemic. The other has carried guilt over her best friend's murder for over 40 years. Together, they discover healing by telling their stories.
Please share a bit about your mental health journey, as much as you are comfortable with :)
I've struggled with insecurity, shyness, and feelings of not measuring up. It's especially tough with all the constraints patriarchy makes on us men. We feel we can't show emotion, make ourselves vulnerable, and we must constantly prove ourselves through material success. I saw my father struggle with those problems to the point that they destroyed him. Writing gives me an avenue to explore these issues.
How has your mental health influenced your writing process or creativity?
The Remainders is an example of how I used writing to deal with my mental health challenges. I wrote it during a time of family crisis when I questioned whether I was a good enough father for my children. These feelings were reflected in the story of an estranged son who became homeless and his troubled father who is dealing with past trauma. They are finally able to reconnect and heal each other.
Do you find writing to be healing, challenging, or a bit of both?
Healing comes from the challenge of writing. The Remainders has a number of scenes that made me cry, such as when a character breaks down when he comes to terms with everything that has happened to him. There are some scenes in Christina's Portrait that unnerved me so much that it took some time for me to get the courage to write them. The scenes that scare you the most are the ones you must write.
Has your experience with mental health shaped the themes or characters in your stories?
Broken men show up in all of my novels, including the ones with female protagonists. This comes from my experiences with my father and my own struggles over the years as I saw how those beliefs can lead to bad ends. I show how these men can either heal and the consequences if they continue down a self-destructive path.
Are there any writing routines, boundaries, or self-care habits that help you stay grounded?
Music is an important part of my writing. I put together a playlist for each writing project, and I listen to songs from it before a writing session. A song that inspired me for decades is "Keep The Fire" by Kenny Loggins. I first heard it during a low point in my life when my mom had a stroke that left her paralyzed for the rest of her life. I've been trying to work it into my writing, and I'm finally able to fit it into the novel I'm writing now.
What advice would you give to other writers who have similar struggles as you?
Don't be afraid to ask for help. Resources are available. Remember, there's nothing unmanly about being vulnerable, sad, and compassionate. Real strength comes from being honest with yourself and knowing you're enough.
Have you ever taken breaks from writing to focus on your mental health?
No, because writing offers me healing.
What’s something you wish more people understood about being a writer with mental health struggles?
Somebody out there needs your writing. While we writers grapple with our own pain, others seek a voice to express their own suffering. The heroes we create to save us can save them. The worlds we build can offer them refuge. The villains we create reflect their fears and demons as well as ours. And we can show how they can be defeated or endured. When we do that, we create a connection. Our readers find healing in our words, just as we found healing in writing them.
Is there anything else you'd like to share with the readers?
The times we're going through can be especially hard on our mental health. But writing enables us to create a vision of a better world. That vision can inspire ourselves and others to fight to make the world just and humane. The hope our words can offer can give us the strength to persist through whatever lies ahead.
Where can readers connect with you and your work? (Socials, website, books, etc.)
You can find everything on my website here. This includes links to my books, social media, and writing on a variety of topics. I also publish a monthly newsletter. A subscription form and back issues are also on my website. On social media (Facebook, Instagram, Threads, Bluesky, and TikTok), look for my handle @maswriter.
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